‘Should we buy a hair colour, you’re looking a bit two-tone’ These were the words that floated to my ears as Steve and I were wandering through the shops yesterday. I virtually stopped in my tracks and looked at my husband of 32 years to a) check it was him that had said it b) to assess if he was testing out a new joke, and c) to decide how to react.
To understand my dilemma you need to know that this sort of discussion rarely takes place between us. I notice when my greys are sneaking through and do something about it. Often when my hair colour has been ‘refreshed’ I sit and raise my eyebrows in Steve’s direction as we’re having a meal for example and expect him to have somehow miraculously noticed the transformation from ‘for older hair’ to ‘natural looking colour’. He doesn’t. I’m desperately trying not to make a very gender discriminatory statement here about noticing, suffice to say I typically lower my eyebrows and continue with my meal…………………So yesterday was one of those firsts. It’s not that we’re not routinely honest with each other, it’s just that like many couples we’ve found our way of doing things together and separately and thinking about my bonce isn’t a together thing.
Fast forward to a couple of hours ago when I was gently informed that my gel manicure (that is only 9 days old and I can typically last 21 days) looks like badly stuck on false nails and my pedicure could also do with a top up. What is this? Cancer’s Next Top Model? I can only surmise that Steve has been so meticulous in reading all of the information that we’ve received from both Breast Cancer Care and Macmillan that he’s become a walking talking fountain of knowledge about tuning into feelings of self-esteem and anxieties that might arise about body image when you have breast cancer and treatments.
This has all made me think about how I react to statements like this. It’s easy isn’t it to revert to your default? To react as you typically would, but these are not typically times for us and we’ve had to find a slightly new way. I’m not 100% sure that beauty advice is part of our ‘new normal’, but let’s see. However, the greys have gone and a manicure and pedicure is booked (semi -reluctantly) for Tuesday.
Talking of Breast Cancer Care, I’ve signed up to hold one of their Strawberry Tea events later in the summer. Basically you prepare strawberry related tea time treats and invite people to come and join you and raise a little bit of dosh for their great charity. I’ve yet to set a date, but I’ll let you know and please come along. Any strawberry related fundraising ideas that we could organise?
Big day tomorrow, Father in Law’s funeral early afternoon and then a 100 mile dash home to Oncologist’s appointment to chat through treatment options and make some decisions. I suspect that’s going to be more difficult than choosing a nail colour.
Short and sweet, but that’s Sunday’s for you!